Who's That Girl?

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With all there is to see online, there’s a good chance that you, like the rest of us, have a handful of people in your niche that you look up to. You may like how they describe things, love their packaging, enjoy their blog and are awestruck by their seemingly constant stream of great new ideas.

‘If she can do it, then I can do it.’

Absolutely! And I’m all for a little friendly competition. In fact, to be a success in business you’ve got to be competitive (even if it’s with yourself!) Everyone has a handful of people that they esteem, respect, and look up to. It’s to be expected.

Consider this; if you’ve taken notice, chances are- others have, too. With the onslaught of new businesses popping up on the internet hourly, truly unique businesses are more and more difficult to come by. When you find one, it’s like a breath of fresh air. So how do you go from being the followed as opposed to the follower? It’s easier than you might think.

We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves. ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

Get to know yourself.

You can’t be original if you don’t know who you are. You may think you know who you are but most of us have merely an idea. And a lot of that idea may be based on who others expect us to be. Or someone we expect to be based on those who we emulate. Toss all of that out the window. Who are you are your very core? This takes time because it’s extra, super hard. And as difficult as you think this is, you end up wishing it were that easy. But it’s worth the work. I promise.

Not sure where to start?

Try journaling. Here are some prompts to get you started.

When you can connect with yourself, you’ll be able to make your life lessons, your triumphs and struggles work for you, not against you.

Draw from your experiences.

Dig deep.

The rest will follow.

There’s only one you and when you create based on your ‘you-est you’, your light will shine more brightly than you’ve ever imagined.

How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something but to be someone. ~Coco Chanel

Make a Plan.

Without a business plan and clearly defined goals, your chances of success are nearly nil. Once you’ve got a handle on who you are, you can decide where you want to go … and not the other way around.

I can’t tell you how many times I sold things on ebay so many years ago because I thought it’s what was trendy. It seemed to be what everyone wanted to buy at the time. I thought I had it all figured out.

Not quite. The result was that when the trend inevitably ended, I was left with a stockpile of yesterday’s news that I’ll be lucky to sell for what I purchased it for years ago.

The reason is simple. I was following trends and going after what I thought was expected. There was a lot of competition. It’s the old supply vs. demand theory at work. The hotter it is, the more likely that a lot of shops will be selling it. So why not strike when the iron’s hot, then? I’ve got no issue with capitalizing on a trend. Millions of dollars have been made like that. BUT, you’ve got to be able to see past that fraction of your business to see what you truly want to be doing. Constantly pursuing the next best thing is exhausting and frustrating and, truth be told, is the reason a lot of business owners throw in the towel. Including me.

I’m proud to say that I’m no longer a slave to the latest craze. Grabbing a quick buck was nice. I just knew it wasn’t what I was meant to do.

I stopped silencing that voice prodding me, did some self-discovery and turned a very important corner. I started Designher Brands a year ago and have done very well. Because I‘m doing what I love.

I’m help other people get in touch with themselves and bust through their self-doubt. With a little encouragement, it’s not all that hard. After all, they put the walls up, so they’re actually a lot easier to knock down.

And I write. In the past year, I’ve written for over a hundred clients including some NY Times Best Selling Authors, famous clothing designers, well-known artists and lots more. I’ve penned magazine columns, biographies, been featured dozens of times, written product descriptions, company business plans several (soon-to-be-released) digi-guides and toolkits with no end in sight.

And I haven’t solicited a single client.

Why?

Because after a decade of chasing clients and business around as a sales person, I finally figured out why it wasn’t working. I was doing the expected. Now, I write what I want to. It comes from the heart. It doesn’t follow convention and it isn’t written because I think it’s what I should be saying.

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings

It all became clear to me as I started making some very important decisions in my own life. I began letting go of some things I had been holding on to for no apparent reason. I took what I needed from these lessons and I let the rest go. I stopped listening to people who were less-than-encouraging. I stopped feeling guilty. I read a lot and did some journaling of my own. I surrounded myself with all good things- things that were good for ME. It took me awhile but the end result is priceless: I’m pretty proud of it. Being genuine has afforded me a freedom I couldn’t ever buy in a store.

And something else happened. As I grew personally, I grew financially. When I wasn’t even looking, I found that I had made more in the past year than I had in the previous two years combined. And I worked fewer hours and carried around much less stress.

I want this for you, too. ALL of you!

So, do yourself the hugest favor ever.

Take yourself out to lunch. Sit quietly. Create.

Look deep into the mirror and ask yourself, ‘who’s that girl?’

The more you get to know her, the more you’ll love her!

Listen to her, she knows what’s best for you.

At bottom every man knows well enough that he is a unique being, only once on this earth; and by no extraordinary chance will such a marvelously picturesque piece of diversity in unity as he is, ever be put together a second time. ~Friedrich Nietzsche